September 14, 2017

Words are inadequate to describe this day.  September 14, 2017 is the day my beloved Dad left his earthly life behind.

When I woke up this morning, I was heartsick.  Word came that Dad was in a deep sleep, but still hanging on.  Sunee and I jumped in the car and rushed up north.  Greg worked frantically to cancel his patients for the day and my neighbor Katie watched my little boys.  I didn't think Sunee and I could cry for five hours straight as we drove up, but I was completely wrong.  The heavens also opened up and dumped pouring rain on us the entire way.  We cried and it rained and somehow we made it to McKay-Dee Hospital in one piece.

I'm not sure I can describe the scene in my dad's hospital room.  It was too tender, too sacred, too heartbreaking to even imagine.  He had been moved to this beautiful room at the end of the hall on the 5th floor.  There was a beautiful butterfly magnet attached to the door frame, which all of us believed was a signal to the staff that this patient was here to die.

We spent hours as a family, holding hands and crying.  Mom, JB, Stalee and Clint, Judi and Mike, Joni, Sunee, and I were all there.  Pretty soon Katie's flight came in and she made it to the hospital.  We all cried and hugged all over again.  Now we just had to wait for Mille who was flying in from Washington, D.C.  We couldn't even dare to hope that Dad would hang on.  His breathing was slowing by the second and Millie wouldn't be there until after 10:00 p.m. Mike and Clint left to take care of their children at home.  My Uncle Wayne and Aunt Jan were waiting in the wings, bringing us a lot of love and comfort.

It was a miracle when Millie walked in and Dad was still with us.  We each got to take a few minutes alone with our Dad.  It was a special moment I'll never forget.  We kissed him and touched him and cried over him a million times over.  Then we all knelt around the bed, holding hands and holding Dad.  We had a beautiful, sacred family prayer together.  And shortly after that, when my mom started to feel upset and worried and anxious about my dad suffering, my Dad took a few, short breaths and peacefully left this world for a better one ahead.

Sometimes there are moments when you can step outside of yourself and see a situation from afar, even when you are right in the middle of it.  As all nine of us leaned over our Dad's bed, with Mom hugging and kissing his face, we sobbed, and sobbed.  All of a sudden, I stepped back in my mind and just listened.  I don't imagine I will ever hear a heartbroken chorus sounding quite like that.  I'll never forget it.

I think we were all exhausted and in disbelief as we packed up our stuff, wrapped our arms around our mom and trudged out of the hospital.  After tucking mom into her bed, Sunee and I slept in the bed in the Red Roof Inn.  Our sobs shook the bed as we alternated between comforting each other and trying to catch some sleep.  It was a very difficult night.  As I started to doze off, I felt a warm, weight on my shoulders, as if I was being wrapped in a warm hug.  It was so comforting and calming that I stopped crying and finally fell asleep.  My last thoughts were of the joyous reunion my Dad must be having in heaven.  My mom's last words to him were, "Go, Greg...just go and have fun."  It was the sweetest thing ever.