August 27, 2018

WHY I AM GRATEFUL MY KIDS GO TO SCHOOL

On the very first day of school, just after I had walked my little ones into their new classrooms, kissed their suntanned little cheeks goodbye, and walked slowly back out to the car, I couldn’t decide if I should skip and sing or sit down and weep.  I had done it.  I had gotten five of my kids out the door, to high school AND middle school AND intermediate school AND elementary school for another year.  With one little one still in tow, I took a big, deep breath. 

I LOVE having my kiddos by my side.  I absolutely love nurturing them and teaching them and playing with them.  They are my whole world!  But I think all parents have doubts.  Which is why every now and then I wonder if it wouldn’t be better to keep them home with me instead of sending them out the door to school.  

I know some amazing homeschool mamas, and I respect them so much.  The way they pour their whole soul into educating their children is inspiring.  This isn’t about that.  I’m not choosing the “easy” way out by sending my kids to a public school. There isn’t a multi-tiered level of mothering where “sending kids to school” falls somewhere below “homeschooling,” and “working mother” is way down in the basement!  Each child is different.  Each family is different.  What really matters is that we love fiercely, nurture each other when we are together, and believe deeply in a lifelong education.  How that looks in my family might be completely different from how that looks in yours.  I also believe that we can ask our Father in Heaven to guide us.  He is the one who absolutely, completely knows what is best for YOUR children.  

I knew their first day would feel long.  I knew it would be hot.  Our temps are still climbing above 100 degrees every day.  I knew our glorious summer days together were coming to an abrupt halt.  And I knew that I would miss being the one answering their questions and laughing at their jokes all day long.  All these thoughts swirled through my mind as I pulled out of the school parking lot, joining a long line of skipping/weeping parents.  And probably because I’ve often dreamt of living in a little log cabin, wearing an apron, and reading the Bible to my children by firelight, I had a thought, “Wouldn’t I be a better mother if I just homeschooled my own children?”  (Maybe you’ve felt like that, too.  “Wouldn’t I be a better mother if I just (insert your own doubts here!)?”)

The morning sun was coming up over the crimson ridge behind me, the cows were slowly grazing in the field, and a small, reassuring voice quietly whispered into my ear, “But you’ve been homeschooling them all summer.”   

Immediately my mother heart filled with peace while my eyes filled with tears. I came home to my quiet house, hugged my three-year old tightly, grateful for his soft skin against my face.  And then I got to work.  I folded up the giant stack of pool towels and thought about every single summer day in our pool.  I thought of the hours I’ve spent teaching each child to swim, the sunscreen I’ve applied, the trips down the slide, the jumps off the waterfall, and all the water that has been splashed in my face.  

I straightened up the dressers and saw all the books we’ve read this summer.  I picked up “Little Britches,” a book I’ve been reading to my little boys about a young boy who helps his father in their homesteading adventure.  We’ve gone through it very slowly, because I stop almost every other paragraph to answer questions about hay rakes, and horses, and train trestles, and crops, and tornadoes.  We’ve googled images for horse-drawn hay mowers and one-room schoolhouses.  We’ve experienced the wonder of the frontier through the pages of a book.  

While wiping the kitchen counters, I paused while staring at the row of jars, each labeled with a different child’s name.  They all contained a different amount of colorful beads—the way we maintain our family economy.  I thought of the way the kids had worked hard to earn those beads, the way they had banded together to earn money for more Legos, the way my daughter had handled all the laundry all summer because, according to her, laundry was a “bead jackpot.”  And then I thought of our trip to Yellowstone, and our quest to see a bear, to see Old Faithful, to see “the woods”—some of my desert-living children were amazed!  I thought of the night we slept in the backyard, and how we talked about the stars overhead.  My mind just started exploding with motherhood memories.  

And then, I decided to formulate a list of all the amazing blessings of sending my children to school.  Of course I’ve heard parents express gratitude for school before.  But it’s often in an I-can’t-wait-to-get-my-kids-out-of-my-hair sort of way.  I certainly understand that sentiment.  But this isn’t that.  

This is Why I’m Grateful My Kids Go to a Public School.  (It is important to note that we live in a very amazing area with a very amazing school system.  I am aware that not everyone has this blessing. I would adjust in a heartbeat if this weren’t the case.)

1. It’s exciting!  We love the thrill of a new class, a new teacher, a new backpack (or a cleaned-up, spiffied-up old one!).  
2. The teachers are amazing!  I am so grateful for the time and effort and extra training our teachers go through so that they can show up and make learning a delight for my children.  I see their dedication, their love for the kiddos, and the creative way they keep up with technology and science and reading.  I am so grateful for the highly-educated educators who watch over my children on the daily.
3. We love the other students!  I know it can be hard sometimes to get along, but some of the best kids I know are walking the halls with my kids, rubbing shoulders, and putting their heads together.  When our family gathered for prayer on the first day of school, I prayed fervently that my children would recognize ways to brighten someone else’s day.  We still pray for that.  And I’m constantly reminding my children (especially on the hard days) that someone out there needs THEM.  I believe my kids can be lifted by their peers, and I hope that they are the ones lifting from time to time.
4. I get some special time with my littles!  I cherish the quiet moments when the big kids head out the door and I’m left with a few little ones at home.  It is so refreshing to have some special buddy-time together.  There are so many things I love about this!
5. The fun things about school!  I love the way my kids practically run out the door on special school days.  I am so grateful for the other parents who help make the holidays special, and the way the teachers provide exciting things to reward the class.  My kids love that!  I love the school sports my kids participate in and the all the band concerts, geography bees, and don’t even get me started about the Give Me Liberty program.  I couldn’t stop crying my patriotic tears as my kids recited the Gettysburg Address and sang the songs of freedom.  I am so grateful they’ve experienced that!
6. Sometimes I just love a change of pace!  With most of my kids off learning from someone else, I have time to think. I can organize a closet, plan a meal or two, whip out some laundry, work on my church calling, read, visit a lonely friend, call my mom, meet my husband for lunch, or go for a long walk with my sister.  In my seventeen years of motherhood, I’ve never done any of that without a little one (or two!) right by my side and usually my days are harder than that, but sometimes the stars align.  I’m still waiting for that “elusive” free time! Ha!
7. They get to come home!  I love the squeals from the little ones at the end of the day when I am standing there to greet them.  And the big ones coming in the door shouting, “Mom?” That’s the best.  I also love being there to listen to all of them unpack a day’s worth of feelings and emotions.  We eat snacks and practice instruments and go over spelling words while I work on dinner.  And then late at night, I help them wrestle with algebra and physics while the washing machine is working on volleyball uniforms, practice jerseys, and P.E. clothes.  When the last light is finally dimmed and I stumble to my welcoming bed, I can hear the words of my mother ringing through my ears.  She used to always say, “I homeschool!!  Every day from 3:00 to 10:00!”  Let’s face it, Mom, some nights it went later than that!  

My list could go on.  And my words might sound completely ridiculous and outlandish to you, especially if your situation is vastly different than mine. I know every family is different! Maybe you work full time, and you wish you could spend more time at home.  Maybe you wish you could work.  Maybe you are going to school yourself and you have to split your time unevenly.  Maybe you homeschool and you doubt whether or not you have the right qualifications.  And maybe you are exactly like me!  But no matter our situation, it can be a blessing to our family.  WE can be a blessing to our family.  So go ahead and make that list of “Why I’m Grateful…WE DO WHAT WE DO….”  Your list should be as unique as you are.  

I heard this quote yesterday, and I want to add it here: It’s not happy people who are grateful, it’s grateful people who are happy! 

I am so grateful for my children.  I am blessed beyond my wildest dreams.  I am thankful that we all have the God-given ability to be grateful in any circumstance, to change what needs to be changed, and to ask in faith for His quiet guidance.   

I am also grateful for a loving Father in Heaven who quietly reassures me that I AM ENOUGH. 

Miles- 7th Grade 

Lance - Preschool

Julia - 9th Grade

Owen - 1st, Austin - 4th

Emma - Junior Year